At this stage I would like to call upon Miss Hermione Jones, The chair of the Calendar sub-committee to give us an update of progress on this year’s...production. Miss Jones, if you please.’Miss Jones a retired librarian, clad in country tweeds with a deer antler brooch in her lapel rose unsteadily to her feet.‘Thank you Madam Chairman, ladies. I am pleased to be able to tell you that January to July is in the can, as those in the film-making business might say.’ She smiled, pleased with her own. -Phyllis DillerAny time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed.-Phyllis DillerWe spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve years telling them to sit down and shut up.-Phyllis DillerBurt Reynolds once asked me out. I was in his room.-Phyllis DillerWhat I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.-Phyllis DillerThe only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day. It was early morning, somewhere around 5:00 a.m. We had been up all night talking about her experiences and looking at her pictures. “Can I stay tonight?” I asked. “I want you to stay. I want to spend more time with you. I want to get to know you. I want you to know that despite what I have told you, I am a normal woman, with normal sexual desires.” She looked so sincere, like she really wanted me to understand. Then she let out a little laugh. “Well, maybe not that normal. I do have a high. I guess they dated in high school or something. Her dad moved down here after graduation. I don't know if he knew my mom was pregnant or what. He was a stunt man for the movies. He died about 15 years ago after an accident. Zoe, that's her name by the way, Zoe Brewer. Anyway, she got the information from her mother who supposedly got it from her father. She didn't know for certain but she said she pieced together enough clues to figure out it was me they were talking about."Al nodded slowly. He.
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